Disrespect....rejection this is what happen

What is Disrespect? Well i will tell you what Disrespect is at Gompers. Will you can know this month was Black History and we all celebrity because of are schools. At first i was like ok here we go again the black talk about whites being racism and how the Blacks make it. Which i have no PROBLEM i think thats cool that they have Black pride. I have Mexican pride and so for that matter i was like when to Mexican's have a month where people acknowledge that we to have done something for America. Will on the staff talk about that we all had they same problem and that Marther Luther King Jr didn't just flight for Blacks but for everyone and i thought that was cool. So i started to feel apart of this celebration and for the first time i was like wow i heard that fact before but finally it suck i finally understood. What these people were doing they weren't just fighting for themselves but for every race that was judge by their color. Because face folks Mexican were in into but instead of being divide we had no where to go. We're not white or Black so where do we go? But anyway the Disrespect apart a whole bunch of kids started to talk when a Pastor was talk for the benefit and it was sad because this guy had allot of good stuff that had nothing to do with God but really it did. But anyways the program when after school and people were talking and the poor guy felt Disrespect an walked out. Embarrassing the teacher and myself. I want to her whay he had to say and i'm not trying to sound like a teachers pet but really this guy flew out and came out to San Diego and was tried and we Disrespect him. Will i though that was wrong. And i felt bad . But before the poor man got interrupted he said some key point that got me think. He said "Don't like Reject stop you ";" Don't like your race, age, or anything else stop you from doing anything in this world". And i though that was sic because this man must have came over lot just to get where he is gone. And men i felt bad foe him because we Disrespected him. And i thought that was mess. But at least he got me thinking. Remember i was writing about me graduating in 06 and how the school won't let me and that i gave up will what he said is true i can't let my age stop me. And i mean i;ve begin think this before he said that but it gave me courage to start over asking my teacher and counsel on what's going on. And am i going to be able. I going to meet the Requirements and if they don't give me my Develop then i will find alway . I know i can work for the Secret Service when i'm 16 and still go to school. And i found allot of Web site that allow me to work and go to school full time and get pay big pucks . For going to school. And his Guy allow me to realize again how important this is to me and i feel so bad for him because i want to hear the rest of it. And i missed out because some kids want to leave. So right now i'm going to ask some teacher if they would ask the principal and help me Graduate . Because this is something i NEED to prove to myself. When people ask me why i want to graduate i draw a blank but something inside of me won't this die . It's not because i want to graduate and leave High school. It's nothing like that ;I want to graduate to prove some people wrong and most importantly myself. I want to prove to myself that i can over come anything with God's help of course but if i try. And men i'm trying i doing search how many kids do you know are going search to graduate . Not many but i'm. I think the main reason why i want to graduate is to prove my Dad wrong he though that me and my brother wouldn't graduate but if i graduate i would prove him wrong and i still before his dumb step daughter too. I know this seem dumb but this is important for proving my Dad wrong about me but most important proving myself because for a while i though that . And i know thats not true but i got to. Because it won't be the same . It's like a dream you have the house you always wanted but you don't have the area . Right and you think that not bad but it wasn't your dream place you got Second best. And my graduating give my Dad the apportioned to say i didn't do what i want . That i got second best and i would know o yeah i graduate in 07 yeah . Yeah i'm so happy not. Because i didn't turn my dream into reality . You know well this is what i got today. Disrespect and Rejection is something you can't let beat you. And unlike that day. I'm not going to let this died out. My Dad and everyone else out there that DOESN'T THINK I CAN MAKE I WILL PROVE YOU WRONG AND I WILL DO IT WITH STYLE. So i know it's going to be hard but guess what i'm tried and if a college doesn't want me which i know isn't true because i've meet amazing people . Like that men and more like the men who were in the WW2 and they were Black and this men i meet him when he was old but i meet him and this men had a hard life but this men was proud and this men was allow to be because he fought for a country that didn't want him to. But he did and that was cool because he didn't let reject stop him. And i've meet others who don't allow rejection to stop them. And i want to be one of those people . I'm not going to let my age stop me. Or teachers who don't think i'm ready. Because i'm and i don't have to prove it to you. I need to prove it to myself. And this is why i need to graduate to prove to myself. And I'm going to tell my story like them and i won't like so nappy head punks stop me because i know out there their some kids that want to make it. And won't end up like the rest. That it bye -deanna

Hey do you know what i think that ..... God roxs

Hey what's up. Will school is getting crazy and my life isn't going the way I want but that’s life. God is throwing me curve balls . So I'm getting hit pretty beaded up here. Me and my Friend are having allot of problems again. Same old . I'm hope that God will here clear my way and let me see the right path. Men because I know I'm not making the right choices and I've begin losing intersect in things. And men I'm pray that I will get back on track. But I know I'm taking my angry out on people and I know that's not Christian and their isn't no good excuse for me . And men I feeling really bad because I make funny of people and I'm not suppose but men life get hard but I know God will help me I just have to be patience and that word I'm starting to hate Nice. Yup I said it. The N word I have to be . Because it what is ask of me. And men it's so hard because I wish that one day I wouldn't have any problem like everything would be ok. At least for a hour . I have an test and I'm not ready for it. But I don't know what I'm suppose to study and really I don't like to study I find it dumb because if you don't know it you won't know it even if you study. Anyway it's fair that the teacher is taking the average of the student at are table and grading us. So anyway it doesn't matter . Anyways I'm trying to keep remindering myself of a bible verse "He heals the brokenhearted and blinds up their wounds. Ps 147:3". And men I just keep remindering myself because God will heal me from this pain that's going on . But men I'm wish that my trial will end but it look like it's not going to any thing soon. So I'm just going to hang on and pray that my coaster life will end. Because it's taking long then the usually ride. So anyway I hope your guy life is going will. Because my life sucks but I'm pray to God that it will anyways move to new subject. Yup school bites . And I'm hunger. And my heart hurts right now. And I have no clue what to do because in the end I'm still thinking of my problem . So you know what I hope that god just take this problem and I won't think about it. You know what I have a new Cd and it's by Hawk Nelson a cool band and I like it so much and I also have Relient K their cool. Which Roxs. So you should look them up. I mean they talk about god but if you like Punk rock you will like them. And you will also lie Relient K and Mxpx . Their all really cool bands. They rox. You I 'm so serious when I'm telling you to look them up. Another Cd that sic is Relient K and my favorite song on that Cd is "Balloon ride". Yup now that song is about God and it's so uplifting I mean when I listen to it I know God is real. And he will help I know he's going to help me through my trails. I just hope soon and men I pray that soon. Will I feel allot better now. I ate some good food Subways YUP I said it . Subways . There is so good men I ate a whole 6 in and some of my mom's . And now chips . You guy know something I haven't written enough late I'm sorry for that it's just men I've begin so busy . Like School, is a life sucker. It's just sucks and never gives back not. I know school has an purpose. This is why we go. You know what theirs another song I like it called "Everything little thing" by Hawk nelson. They rox. Will I think that’s it . Bye - deanna

Wat up

Wat up it's me . And i'm listeing to my Relient K music . Their a cool band. Men the sic and their off the chain. LOL na i'm just playing i always wonder why people wrote like that it personal gets ok my nevser because sometimes i can't understand it . So wat up is ok but whas' crackulatin'. Meaning whats up.I'm going to go over the Ebonics Dictionary. Yup= yes . Hehehe. This is going to be fun. Ok what is whacking well some teacher at my school are starting to say this verse . Will i'm sorry teacher i'm not going to tell you. Hehhe . Will what else do teenager say. Here is the Vob.


Vocabulary
2 chicken wingspeace out

a'ight(Pronounced "ite") All right

all that "That boy is all that." "That song is all that and a bag of potato chips!"

axAsk "Let me ax you somtin!"

ball upAn exclamation stating the beginning of a basketball game. A statement clarifying that it is time to start or resume playing basketball now that everyone is ready.

benjaminsmoney. Usually hundred dollar bills, hence the reference to Benjamin Franklin on the U.S. 100 dollar bill. "It's all about the benjamins."

biting me(pronounced "BITIN' ME") Copying someone. "Man you know I bought this jacket first, why you biting me?"

bling-blingjewelry- especially someone wearing a lot of gold jewelry. "Check out Jose’s bling-bling!" or "Jose’s blinging it!"

bootlegadj. Newer term to replace "ghetto". Something that is an imitation, cheap or of bad quality. "oooh, that Macaroni and cheese was bootleg!

" C-Notemoney, $100 Dollar bill, benjamins.

cheezinv. Smiling. "Why you cheezin so big?"

chillin v. to simply

"hang out" with no purpose or reason. "I'm just chillin wit my friends."

coolIf you don't know what this means, please exit now.

dopeadj. Late 80's verbage, still used in some arenas for something good, excellent or appealing. "Check out his dope ride!"

down low or D.LSecret, keep it a secret, not public information. "Jesse just broke up with Stacey . . . keep it down low"

E_classn. A really expensve car (ie, Mercedes, Bently, Rolls Royce) "Homie ridin e_class."

flavaflavor, exact meaning. "you know the flava" foon. (derived from fool) a friend. "

Whasup foo?" for sheezy(derived from "for sure") A statement of agreement. "Are you sure you want to go to ice cream?" "For sheezy!"

G-moneyn. A name for someone that meets all criteria of being "cool." A name when greeting a friend. "Whasup G-money?"

heckaadv. used in conjunction another word as an intensifier. Examples include: hecka-cool, hecka-stupid, hecka-crazy, or hecka-funny. "I called your name hecka times, but you didn't come."

hollav. To say a greeting. To say "what's up!" hello, good-bye, call mehomien. Old word (derived from the Hispanic Americans who used "homes" as a label for others) that means friend or companion. "Whasup Homie?"

iceJewelry, usually just diamonds. "Man, I'm about to jack that ice he's got on!"iced outwearing a lot of jewelry. ”Check out all that bling-bling, you’re iced out!” illv. cool, in style Ioda= anything u want it to meanI'm straight to declare that you are all right in your current state of being, as if to say "I'm cool," or "I'm good already." jankyadj. old or broken. "Billy, we ain't taking your janky old car to the prom!" kickin' itv. To relax, usually with ones friends. To merely exist, usually with no work involved. "Where are you going Billy?" "Just kickin it with my friends!" let's bounceSomething said when it is time to leave. Let us leave the premises now. M&Malright. A little above mediocre. "Do you like the that youth pastor?" "yea he's M&M" nah-uh! 1. An exclamation proclaiming resistance. "Pick up garbage? Nah-uh! Not me!" 2. Expression of unbelief or awe when someone shares a story of something cool or amazing. "Jimmy won $1,000,000? Nah-uh!" "off the heezy"or"off the heezy for sheezy"meaning very cool. partnern. (pronounced "pot naw") A friend. A loyal associate. "Was' up pawdna!" peace outa farewell remark. To say to someone, especially a friend, "Good_bye" phatadj./adv. (pronounced "fat") Very good, cool, top notch. "His corvette was phat!" also used as as acronym, Pretty Hot And Tempting. represent Trying to do your best; to achieve some respect. "I'm just tryin' to represent." Rocksn. Fat or big diamonds sickadj. sick describing an extremely good trick in an extreme sport "That was a sick ollie over the stairs braw!" Slammin' Awesome! or Outrageous! "that's a slammin' outfit" stokedadv. A skater or grunge term for extremely happy. "Did you see that trick? I was stoked I landed it!" tight adj./adv. an older term that still maintains its presence that means good or very nice. "Man . . . did you see that lowered Cadillac? It was tight!" truea phrase said to express agreement, as if to say "I agree" or "good point."true dat That's true upsthe ability to jump very high. (see "hops") "Look, Billy's got mad ups!" whas' crackulatin'(derived from "What's crackulating?") What is going on? How is it going? Good to see you. When greeting someone say "Whas' crackulatin'?" whasup(derived from "what's up?") What is going on? How is it going? Good to see you. If you pass someone, bob your head once, raising your chin about an inch and say "Whasup?" what's crackin?See wassup? What's poppin?See wassup? ZebcoolZebulousdope, fabulousZishbe quiet

hey whats up

Hey whats up? Will there nothing happening here. I'm just at home thinking what am i going to do with this friend of mine his really bothering he always questioing my thoughs about improtant thing. Byt anyways i have no clue what to do with this guy he's getting under my skin and it's bothering me because i don't like being question about thing that i'm not sure about but he keep at it. And one day i'm going to snap back at he and his not going to like it.So anyways school is going ok i guess and i guess life is ok for me. I 'm starting to think that high school is a waste and really it's boring. Today one of my teacher was giving us some speech about not being ab's and trust me i have allot on my report i have 14. And thats not counting the one's i miss this weeks and men . I feel bad but not really because i do my work i mean i take a day but i made up for it. But anyways i got an good grade of my lit. Test but the funny part is i didn't study for them. I'm so glad that test don't really have a big affect on are test. Our teacher is very nice when he grades us. I like that. I mean i write allot but it's so much better then studying i hate studying it so boring i wonder what am i going to do when i go to college. So any on monday i when to the mall and took some pic. But the lady who took are pick was a very bitter person and it was funny but not very because allot of her joke worth a little weird. But anyways it was funny and one of the pic you could see my face i fade into the background that how white i am. That sucks but o will. Anyway i found out that maybe the lady that was working for her is a leader for the junior higher at my chruch. That is bad not really but anyways. Will what else is there to talk about. I think by the end of this year i will have about 2o something ab's and that sad. But i don't know but i guess it just ... I don't know but i get good grades so it's ok. I guess. My back hurts i have no clue why . I haven;t done anything wrong. Will bye see ya .Bye deanna

Hey what's up

Hey it's me . What's up I hope your weekend is going good. Will mine is . Will I've begin hanging with my friends and what's else. Doing some Homework yea some teacher gave us homework. Sucks I know. Will it school and the quicker the better... Will not for me I will be going to school for 10 years after I graduate for high school. That's a pretty long time. But I did that I need four different degrees to become what I want . A apoloigeic, it's a Christian person that stand up for religion . Like mount Solodad cross. I would be like this is why it should stay .... You know I pretty good with things like . So I need Law, religion, socology and writing. Thats allot but thats what i need and so i have allot of thing i didn't to do. So i better get started with it. Will my counsler and teacher have no clue what to do. CAT9 is coming i already took the 10 grade one. So i'm wondering if i have to take again. Probadly but men i pass it. I also have to take the high school exit exam. So mad i've have so much i have to study for but i'm not going to worry about it because it's nothing. It's just some dumb test and if i think i will pass it. Right . I hope , will i got to go bye -deanna

whats up

hey it's me . I'm bored again and my stomach is hurtign really bad. I think i ate some really bad food. Hehhe. Anyways other then that i'm ok.I'm listening to Relient K and some other bands. Their really cool you should check them out. I also have begin working on remembing verse . So far i remember two I probadly remember more but for right now those are the ones i know.I rememeber 2 Cor 2:15 and Ps.147:3 and thats happen it. But i'm trying to write little saying so i can remember more. Their all bible verse and they have a really cool message. Will thats all i have to say so bye -deanna

hey whats up

Hey i really don't have allot to talk about . It just i'm having this problem and i don't know what to do. It's driving me up the wall. And yet i'm here wrutting about it. Will i hope that it doesn't affect me at school. Because right now it's . Will i firgure out that my G.P.A is actually 3.5 because i have a weighted class. So i'm happy about that i hope that next time i can get an 4.0 and whats else it there to say. Ummm i hope that this coming year will be better then this year.So anyways i'm suppose to do something but i forget what . Whatever i really don't feel like writting so bye- deanna

X's of life .....???

Today was a weird day i woke up sad and angry and I know why but really their is nothing I could do about it.And i guess thats life because right now i'm in a place that is striking me mind and men it's driving me crazy. Because i wondering what is right . I'm beginpray for along time and right now i'm thinking i made a worn decidtion and it's hurt bad. Because in the end really i agree to some thing i can't do . i can't be his friend their is no way of me putting all of feeling to the side and pretends their not there. Men today i realize i was trying to hide everything from my friends and it worked for most of them but in the end one of them found out what i was going through. And she talk to me knowing the problem because me and her are really close . And all the lies I've begin tell myself about not going back out with this guy that i've like for two years now. She lay it all out that i can;t be this guy friend because mine feeling will always get in the way. You know what i mean my emotions will stop me from talking to him because i don't want to across a line that we made and decide . And really i'm tried of life because people are telling me what's best for me but in the end . Their hurting me . Like or insisted i'm suppose to be in the 11 i have right now three years of language and i have three years of math. And i have 1 years of world and American history . And i have an 1year in science . And i have so much in art and electives . Men i have so much it's crazy. Now next year i will meet all of the requirements of an graduate and subtlest. Now i'm also taking college class in the summer i'm taking history and science . So i will have more then what i need. But no they want me to be more then ready. I think emotional and spirituality i'm ready. And i'm never going to exceed at anything if i am fearful of me not being ready . Right. So i think i'm ready to step out into the world and yes it's going to be hard of course . I'm dealing with some right now and i'm not even in high. But the thing is if i made it my whole life talking to an adults and one of my best friends is an adult and the crazy part is she say that she learn from me. And i was surprise but she told me that when i need it the most . Because i was going to give up on gruadating but she incourage me to keep going because it was right of me . I'm ready to step out . And it doesn't matter about me age. And i was to stress that it's not that i'm rushing to be done with school. But i don't have much time on this world and i am taking my time but i know this is what i'm suppose to do. Because god wouldn't have put this on my heart or my mentor that this is what i'm suppose to do . And i know what school i want to go to already. I've checked out so many . And i know what i want to be . And i want to say your not sending an child into the world because guess what i'm already am. And i have god there to help me. And I know what the world can do to world can do to people i've seen it. And a reminder your not sending a foolish child into the world because i know what i'm going to do and i know where i'm going to live and i know where i'm going to school and i know what grants and programs i can apply to . So i'm going to be ok. Bye -DEANNA

the ruber band .... Does it work .....

Will yesterday me and a couple of other have took it upon us that we didn't need to get use to sin. Meaning cusing and goissip and so many more. Here is where the ruber band comes in it's a pushiment if i cuses or do anything according to me that is sinful and pull it back and let it rip. So far it's working and i relaize people around me cuse allot . And i never realize it. I though they only cuse often but it's ok ture sin soon becomes unnoticble. My friends think it's dumb but really it isn't .It's a very good an ideal because it keeps me on track with what i'm letting in my head. And is it very good. Because cusing isn't good for two reason it discussing and it show lack of repect. So hey if you hear it smack their some one in the room that probadly doing the same thing i'm doing. Ok hey it'a good for you and them because cuse limted allot of thing. And it's sad because nowdays thats the only ways we commucate. Will i guess thats all i have to say. So it's time for me to say good bye - Deanna Voss

whats up

Hey i don't know why but i change my title i don't like anymore. Now it's "writtinf for something... But i don't know.... I like it for some reason it rythmes and it sound smart hehhe. Will i just want to say that . and also that you all bite. Hehhe I'm just playing and that remind me what happen today. You all know that yesterday was valentine's and everyone of teddybears and stuff like that. Will one of my friends had her bear out and the teacher told her to put it in her bag but she told him it wouldn't fit and he said he would make it fit. But see said that if she touch her teddy bear that she would knee him in the ball. She's so cool. I would love to say that once . I mean men that so cool just to stand up for that. I'm an chick i don't really stand up for allot of think i guess thats good and bad. The only think i stand up for is god and my friends because i hate people picking on my friends. But men just to stick up for something that doesn't push me over. Men thats so cool . And she said it was a sense of coolness like she didn't care what would happen to her. Allot of the class though that she got balls. And she does men . She straight out say it . It wasn't under her breath she said it loud and proud. Will anyway bye -deanna

Home tips I was reading an Filer and it was so shocking to me it for teens in crises . And here are some facts I found out about a America the land of the great . Everyday in America:3 kids die from abuse or neglect 3 kids die from HIV infection95 babies die518 babies are born to mothers who had no prenatal care1,407 babies are born to teen mothers2,660 babies are born into poverty2,833 kids drop out of school6,042 kids are arrested8,493 kids are reported abuse or neglected100,000 kids are homeless135,000 kids take guns to schoolWow talk about fact . These fact and really happen they happen everyday for kids just like us . And we call America the land of freedom we say it's so wonderful to live in America but everyday you know someone in these world is in deep pain and hurting . And we would never know about it. I know many people who have begin homeless I was one of them. And I know their is more then that many kids. It just some parent don't report and some aren't called "homeless" but they are. And I know some people who have begin arrested and drop from high school. And when I think about those numbers seem pretty low. I don't know when these filer had begin updated but I was watching the news and an 30 years old women had try to find her child away by say she saw someone throw it out the window and he stop and saved the baby and turn it into the police. And this isn't the first story like this. These are the fact and we can stop. We have so much violence and men it's crazy how we are so blind . I never knew that San Diego has 5,000 homeless but that only counting one sheather that I know of that hold that many. Adults and teens and children and that crazy because we are such a weath country but we fact so many thing like three world countrys do. Why just think about these facts about America the land of the great . Not

I was reading an Filer and it was so shocking to me it for teens in crises . And here are some facts I found out about a America the land of the great .

Everyday in America:
3 kids die from abuse or neglect
3 kids die from HIV infection
95 babies die
518 babies are born to mothers who had no prenatal care
1,407 babies are born to teen mothers
2,660 babies are born into poverty
2,833 kids drop out of school
6,042 kids are arrested
8,493 kids are reported abuse or neglected
100,000 kids are homeless
135,000 kids take guns to school

Wow talk about fact . These fact and really happen they happen everyday for kids just like us . And we call America the land of freedom we say it's so wonderful to live in America but everyday you know someone in these world is in deep pain and hurting . And we would never know about it. I know many people who have begin homeless I was one of them. And I know their is more then that many kids. It just some parent don't report and some aren't called "homeless" but they are. And I know some people who have begin arrested and drop from high school. And when I think about those numbers seem pretty low. I don't know when these filer had begin updated but I was watching the news and an 30 years old women had try to find her child away by say she saw someone throw it out the window and he stop and saved the baby and turn it into the police. And this isn't the first story like this. These are the fact and we can stop. We have so much violence and men it's crazy how we are so blind . I never knew that San Diego has 5,000 homeless but that only counting one sheather that I know of that hold that many. Adults and teens and children and that crazy because we are such a weath country but we fact so many thing like three world countrys do. Why just think about these facts about America the land of the great . Not

wat up

OK hey whats up. I really don't know what to talk about. I'm blank and i really don't know what you guy want me to talk about. School is normal and my walk with god is getting back on track i'm doing so will. I think . Yesrterday i couldn't stop talking about my meeting . Leadership and you know what it help me know that i won't know what people are going through but at least i can be there to help them . And i like that bible study because it taugh me so much. Anyways but after that me and my pastor and my friend luiz Played Playsitution. It was so fun i bet them last time but this time they beat me . But it was because i was thinking about something. And it mess up by game. And i have no guess . But i stood up really late last night thinking about it and i know it was dumb i shouldn't have begin at school. But i also got really sick on sunday and monday i wasn't feeling to good. And today i was very not feeling to good. But don't worry i'm better don't worry. I don't know why my family is getting so sick. But we are and i just pray for are healty because i don't want anything bad to happen to us. Yeah anyways my report hasn't came yet. So i'm wondering what i will be getting. It takes along time. For it to arrive. So I'm wondering what i have. And i know that i have allot of thing i need to do today so bye -Deanna Godless

newspaper

Ok I don't get this i leave my old school to get out of the Newspaper but now i'm back in it . That sucks and i got the worth job. I'm topic is Teen Tips. Like i'm a person who gives good tips. Anyways i bet this isn't going to last long. Half the class isn't into it . And to started a newspaper everyone even the teacher has to be .... I don't know like every happy about having a newspaper and trust me . Not allot of teachers have that .Anyway allot of the student think this is a waste of time. And it's if they don't want to do it. People join Newspaper because they like it not because they have to. See this is how i see it ; If you like it your going to give it your best but if you don't your not . Simple as that. Anyways the topics are wack. That what i think. We should cover other thing. Will anyways . I hope it turn out ok because our names our going on this wedsite and next week we will be doing it. I think it;s alittle to much but hey that me. Will my topic is Fashion . I hate it but it something that i know about . You know what i want to do dear abby. Or something. Will anyway the word limted is 250 thats nothing. I though it should be a page at else. But no . This newspaper is going to be .....Will it's the teacher ideal. And i'm going to laugh when it turn out .... Anyways who cares . I'm tried of writting but i find myself writting more because now a thousand word it nothing i can write so much more. I'm not trying to be big head but it's true. And i though that My teacher was being a pain but really in College they expect that from their students. Anyways i like useing that word anyways. I found what am i going to do. I don't even know when this assiment is suppose to be turn in . I just know what the teacher want but i'm not sure . If he going to get it. Anyways i don't think my teacher understand the true meaning to a newspaper because he wants an issue this week right but . To start a newspaper a article gets check at least three time before going in and also if it's going eye catching . And is it enteranting. Because if it's not no body going to read it . I don't care who they are their not going to read it. But anyways this week he want one thats crazy because i as you can see i can't spell and i'm not the only one. Will anyway their so many that tese kids need than and topic . They need to learn the repondible of writing. And this is why i think this is not going to end up will. Sorry but it's true . They kids aren't devoted to it. This is why newspaper is an AFTER SCHOOL PROMGRAM. Because you have to care about it to make an really good newspaper. And what else you need time with school . We are doing this in class . Thats not going to work we need captain. We need editors we need leaders. We need people who know how to work an newspaper and teach the other to do it. And am not going to do it. Because i didn't like newspaper it take your whole life . You can't do anythig else it's time eater. Because you want to write good stuff not trash. And so this why i don't think is it going to end will because no one like it. Anyways will i got to go this was homework anyways i think i have a thousand... But let me check. Bye -Deanna

this is the last time

This is the last time i go back and this time i'm serious i don't care what people say. I'm not in love with him and i wish i never was but it's over. I've decide to spend me time and energy on my walks with god and school. I'm not going to think about him. I don't care i'm tried of him telling me the same thing. I'm making this final we are friends are nothing more. Because i tried of trying og making things right. So i'm moving on . So with everything else since i have nothing holding me back with school i'm going to notice on it a little more now. Guys and friends are not going to be the thing that stop me. In the summer i going to take college class and i going to past . And also i'm going to meet the requirements of graudating and i'm going to graudate and i'm going to do it with style because that the person i am. So even those i'm going to have to give up thing i'm going to want but in the end i'm going to have so much more then what that would ever me. A relationship is something thats not for me i mean it's so resticting i find it annyoing and i hope tha i never get married. Because i find it something that we human can't truly love anything or anybody . Some might say that i have a cold heart and it's probadly true but i guess i would either had a cold heart then a broken one. The only one i love is GOD and thats it and no body else i mean romanticly . Love romanticly sucks. And it's not worth it. Right love is something that suppose to be beautiful and we humans mess it up. We make it so sinful . As you can see i said"we" mean all of us even me. I though i was in love and wow it was crazy because i was so sad it's isn't worth it. Forget what i said before it's not worth it . So why do we try and try to fall in love i have no clue .I try and try to keep being in love with GOD because his the only one that truly loves me. Love is something that even the goverment agree with which is crazy. I'm wondering so make up with valentine's day . I really don't like ever since i was little i mean i used to think it was ok but now it something that haunts me . O the world telling me i need a date this day and i need someone to buy me something but really i don't want to date anyone and i just want to be alone . And not care . A couple of day i will a mit i was happy because i might
have dated this guy that i really care for. But i found that the his scraed of what people will think because we all tried had dated . But i don't care will i did but a firend make me realize that if i didn't give us a second chance that i would alwasy whats if. Will you know what i try now it'sn him because i was going to said yes but thats gone. Now we are just friends and that it. I'm gone and i hope that i can move on . But not to another guy but in life and quit stumbling over the same block. So i wonder whats going to happen now . I hope nothing that has to do with dating anyone because really even those i telling you all i hate love really i don't it just i'm mad because this guy hurt me again. And i'm tried of getting hurt . And love isn't one of my strong things. I wonder what going to happen we he check his e-mail . I bet he won't e-mail me back he would be like what. Their's no way i'm dating this girl again. He told me once the i'm emo . Mean i have allot of emotional battles . Heheehe anyway i don't care.Anyway i hope GOD will bless my life with things that are better for me . I mean i don't want to be mean. But me and that guy should only be friends. I hope he thinks the same because i don't know what i would said if he ask me out again. Because for the past couple weeks his begin e-mailing me about giving us a second chance . So what am i going to do if he does e-mail me back. Will today i saw him and we didn't talk but we couldn't really because their were people. I mean really talk without people easy-droping.Will today we went to chruch and men i hope that the promise i made to god holds because right now i'm sliping . Because men whatever. I don't care . I really hope that it sticks because right now i get blame for everything. Love sucks and i don't know what to do . Because right now i really don't care for it . And that scaered me because i don't want to get married i want to be married to my work. And GOD. Of coruse because GOD is everything to me. I just hope that my walk keep strong and lord i hope you can help me right now. With what i need to do.Because i really need your help. Will i'm going to go because i have to . Even those i don't want to do . Bye-Deanna

whats up

I'm so bored right now i have no clue to do. I just finish something that i need to do like cancel. And right now my little brother is being a BRAT. And i'm getting tried of him. Will i got my report card it was bad . I for my G.P.A i have 3.3 . Men i was count for a 3.5 but i guess i didn't get that this time. With everything i deal with men it's crazy but i guess i'm not the only one. I just hope next time i can do better. Will tomorower i'm going to see my friends . Only for a couple hours i guess it's something. And then monday i go to chruch .I wondering how thats going to go. I wonder if i can do that. Will i told my mom if she make me badysitt on a sunday i wouldn't do it and so i guess that was it because she didn't argue back. Which is weird on her part i always take care of him. When ever she needs my help will i guess thats how things go. Men i'm go bored and i should be i was suppose to go somewhere . As you can tell i'm mad because i made promise to people that i would be there with them . But i guess i broken them and i hate breaking promise . But it's not my fault . It's her's she lied to me . But i guess it's ok . Because this is what i need to do. Even if i don't want to be here with this BRAT kid that she spoils like crazy. Men i wish i could get out of here. Men i hate it here. And the kid nexts door is bothering me . Men and he's so annoying . He tell my brother to disobey me so i'm not letting him in. I know thats mean but what else sould i do i can bearly handle my brother and now i'm suppose to take care of my neighbors kid too. I don't think so. I'm not here to badysitt i'm suppose to go to a party. Anyway he left anyways my brother need better friend that boy only comes to play with the conputer but i'm on it so ha. Snd this isn't really helping i though me writing me feels out would help but it's not . So bye i'm going to watch t.v . -deanna

I used to be ...

I used to be in a newpaper at my old school and I was going through my old thing and I came across one of the essay that i need to do . It's sucks really bad but here .

A begin to a new start.
Not to ago long we had a job faire. Why? Because we
Want had to teach kids the right way to deal with business like people. So they will have the confidence to talk to a well-adjusted person. We Monarch student have been working on this protect for an every long time. Getting ready for this event wasn't easy and had to start working with the students to teach them indenpented living skill that was where ILS came in, in fact ILS stands for indenpented living skills. Directing the advent was Rachel Jacobson and John Rosicky. They both help by dressing the kids and getting them ready for something that they will ever forget a lesson learns and that and be used. Only a few came but it was something need. This is one of are owner best advents that monarch has hosted . And by the help of the business class who learn and help with showing up and getting this ready for next year .

poems

The days have come to past and the lord open the gates right in front of me , and i wonder why , and he said "it's because i love you and i'm you father " and i said for once lord i'm holding on to you i won't let go . nothing would keep me a way from you ... even after the painful day i cry and no one was there to hear me you were lord i know and i will seek you every day and i pray that i will know you more than ever before your love is great than the river and the ocean . and you are my water you are my way and my light thank you for good friday and the other days that i awake to these beautiful days that you have gave me . and the world that you created and these thing that i see that you make not i and that you found me i heared you call to ... me to safed in you arm i will alway be safe
your love is what safed me ... throught these years you knew me better than anyone ... and you called me out in front of a group



did i do the right i wonder if i could have help i saw that young boy stand alone but i said it was too late how can i help so i left and that night i read the good man story i wonder if i asked if i could only took the time and help i could have understand but yet i when on my way i wonder could i have help him he was about 9 i could have stop lord can you forgive me i left him on his own but i didn't know him and it was late but he look lost and i left him there at the front side of the park he look lost and yet i left him there lord can you for give me and to the boy srry that i wasn't there ... i 'm srry i could have help and yet i when and i could have help you but i left you in front of the park hoping some one else could have help you but the person should have been me


Lord i run to you and you hold on to me
The love is what i what want
The mecry is what i need
The kindess is what made me stay
Your heart is the loving
The prices you pay was to high for me and ones around
But you thought it was
lord you pay the highest prices to spend enterial with us and the days that i see i will get on my knee and worship you unitl the days end you are my light the sun that i need the air that i breanth and you are my whole world you my father that i never had the joy i've always begin looking for the world that surround me everyday you are there with me


He said
From above i will love
from up close i will know
for who you are i will care for you
for you i will give up my only son to died on the cross for your sins
i will love you and that my promise to
i will care for you like no other
and no one will speard us
because i love you and you are my child and we are strong together

hey

Today is something i wish that never came. I had so many thing i need to do ,but i guess their are more important thing i guess. I was suppose to go to my friend's bady birthday and i was also suppose to go to a party for Valentines. But i had to badysitter because the badysitter had to go to a funeral . And i'm the one that has to stay. So i guess this is everyday life. For me i wonder why i can't graudate in 06 but i can do so many thing that are what a "older adult" do. I mean all i want to do is graudate and go to a college an move on i know i'm young but i know i'm tried. And move out of my house and live my life. So I can be what i want to be . But i know i will see trial and i know sometimes i'm going to wish that i didn't graudate early but i know it something that i'm suppose to do. I knew ever since i was little that i was suppose to do something great but right now i'm feeling that no body thinks i can make but i don't care because i know i can. And i wonder what would happen if i graudate in 06 and move out of my house . I think i would be better than i'm now. People always wonder why i want to leave . I have a good home it's better then some. But i always begin on my own i do better on my own . Because thats all i know how to do . I can take care of other but i don't let other take care of me. I mean i'm a christian and i'm suppose to lean of god and i trying it's so hard for me to count on someone else other then me . My school my life and my problems are mine . And i'm the one always worrying for my family and trying to help and i'm always helping me mom. Because that just the type of person i'm but latly i don't want to help any more i just want to live my life and do what is best for me. But i know whats best for me isn't best for others. So i've to wonder which one is more important others or me. And i know before i always put others first and i step to the side and let people do what they want.I was taking to one of my friend and she told me the last time i step to the side i lost something i really care for. And now i'm scare of taking it back this person that i love is coming back to me but i scared that i will do the same thing again. And i'm wondering is it worth it. I had so much pain when me and him broken up but it was because i step a side. And i have no clue what i'm going to do now because now i'm trying to try excuse to not go back with this guy. My friend made me agree that i still love him. But i don;'t know what am suppose to do. I want to get back together with him i care for him. But i'm having dounts and i'm wondering is it worth it. Will i got to go . Bye -deanna

in the end ...

In the end i have no clue whats going on. Today was the crazy day i mean my teacher trying to say that i'm going to fast but the thing is i wasn't going fast even if he didn't sign i still wouldn't have done it. And judge me before he ask . He say that i wouldn't understand the poem because i work fast but he didn't ask me what it meant . He didn't let me explain he made a decidtion without any infro. You know what i mean anyway thats not whats bugging. It just men life something gets so hard and right now i have no clue what to do. Everybody think i'm going so fast but i'm not i understand . But why notice on the bad when their good things. And when i think about this is why we have Racism still because people judg without finding out. And it sad . I started to think that we all are same but people can face the fact that we are . I would explain more but i'm starting to think that nobody read this so why would i write. Bye

Ok

I need 200 word more . See every week we need to write thousand word. And i want to get it done before the weekends. Because that when my teacher read them. I really don't know if he does but i really don't care if he does read my work. While what else can i talk about 200 word isn't that much so i need to write something. Like school. It's sucks. And i'm tried of it and my teacher are some what cool and then other i wish i wasn't even in that class. But hey life goes on right. I wonder what happen to day. I wonder if i got homework (hw). While it's tuesday. Ummm. I wish that one day i can not worry about anything. I wish one day i would be in a room and kick it with my friends and just hang out you know what i mean. I don't think this is a 100 words men. What else can i talk ....; I don't think i like anyone . I don't care about school anymore it's not imporatnt to me. I do care allot about my walk with god . That one thing i care about . Men . What else . Men ok bye - Deanna

whats up here another story

I'm really bored so I'm going to come up with a story. I have no clue what's it's going to be about but here it goes.

It was a bright morning and the clouds clear and the sun shine so bright . But that day didn't seem like it was going to be a good day. It' seem like that day was going to be the last day Annlizze got to talk to her friends and say good bye. Because she wouldn't be able to talk to them . Because the place she was going she was suck looking at them but they couldn't see her. She woke on a Monday morning and looked at her window and to found herself gone. She but everyone else did seem to notice that her whole body was gone. She was no where to be find. It was like she was never there . Her mom and dad when to work and didn't even notice that their daughter didn't come down from the stairs and eat with them. She decide not to go to school . And wait for her parent to come home and yell at her because she didn't go to school . But she was waiting for hours . And they decide not to come home . When Annlizze look at her parents calendar she was suppose to go to camp that week. But she was founding why her parent answer her back when she said she was not feeling good. But then she was wondering would the camp call her parent to let them know they lost there daughter. I wonder what would they say .She asked herself. But then she when to the Television and watch her favorite TV show "The Simpson" . To find that her camp that she was suppose to go to was under attack . Someone knew that the riches kids were there that day. And they were all host. And her parent came home and call up stair wishing that I was there they couldn't see me I was right there in front of them . I said hello . But I guess they were so worry about me that they wouldn't hear me. I was yelling but they still couldn't here me .

I started to think I was a ghost because my favorite place was home , Because no one could bother me . But my friend Joeanna called I pick up the phone and I was talking to her. She said she was go happy that I wasn't a the camp . I was like I wish I was. At least I would know if people would see me. And I told her everything. I asked her to come to the backyard so I would find out. She said she would she me but I ask her why would my parent can't. I called all of mine friend and some could see her and other couldn't .She stated to wonder why . Why was this happening to her she didn't understand why her parent couldn't see her. She wish that her parent would. But everyday she was "Missing" the farer her parent were. And the more they forgot . So she learn to live with them and not be notice it was just when they did see her. She when to school. But she tried to keep her parent from noticing that she wasn't gone that they never really knew their daughter. And she grew up and she never came back .

Hey

OK hey whats up. I really don't know what to talk about. I'm blank and i really don't know what you guy want me to talk about. School is normal and my walk with god is getting back on track i'm doing so will. I think . Yesrterday i couldn't stop talking about my meeting . Leadership and you know what it help me know that i won't know what people are going through but at least i can be there to help them . And i like that bible study because it taugh me so much. Anyways but after that me and my pastor and my friend luiz Played Playsitution. It was so fun i bet them last time but this time they beat me . But it was because i was thinking about something. And it mess up by game. And i have no guess . But i stood up really late last night thinking about it and i know it was dumb i shouldn't have begin at school. But i also got really sick on sunday and monday i wasn't feeling to good. And today i was very not feeling to good. But don't worry i'm better don't worry. I don't know why my family is getting so sick. But we are and i just pray for are healty because i don't want anything bad to happen to us. Yeah anyways my report hasn't came yet. So i'm wondering what i will be getting. It takes along time. For it to arrive.So i'm wondering what i have. And i know that i have allot of thing i need to do today so bye -Deanna Godbless

whats up

Today was a slow day. It was normal but not really in just seem that some class when faster then others. Will i turn in some note about this poem called "WE WEAR THE MASK" By Paul L.Dunear or something. But i guess anyways it was a really good poem you should look it up. While i'm not going to write anymore about that story . I really don't care for it anymore. Since none of you reponsed to it . So anyways my teacher was tell us about something about writting and i though i should have rised my hand . But i didn't want to write about the school . I really don't much about it . Anyways i was more intesected in the thing that teenager thing.... Where if you send in your work that they would .... I forgot. But they would do something like turn it into a book . But anyways i want to do that but i don't know if i have good stuff stories to. I mean my mom likes them and my mentor . But they like me and of corse their going to like me work . They think whatever i do is so great . I need someone to tell me the true. You know what i mean. While today and yeaterday i was ask by my teacher to think about my past and i though about it. One was about My first date and you know what i don't remember it i remember who i was with but i don't remember if i was happy. Will anyways the second thing was i forgot i guess it wasn't that important. Will i got to go . I don't want to write more then what i have to because i don't get extra credit for it so bye -Deanna